I don't know what to title this ... how about "The night I COULD have went to the club."

I went to Selam, a bar/restaurant on U street owned by some of my family this evening. Just to hang out.

There, I met this guy named Carson. According to him he was pushing 50, but he looked a bit older.

Anyway, we ended up conversing pretty much the whole night, in between shots with the bartenders, cigarettes, and some good food.

Every once in a while you run into someone that just drops knowledge like its hot. This is one of those fellows. He writes poetry, and he shared with me a few really good poems. I thought I would share one with whoever cares to read this blog.

"Go on talking to an imaginary person,
or flesh and blood, likewise
and be none the wiser.
Truth is a small string one steps over.
Wisdom is a persistent preoccupation."

"Wow" moment.

We went on talking for an hour or so, and he shared an anecdote which I will pass along as well:

I was regretting the past,
and fearing the future.
Suddenly my Lord was speaking:
"My name is I Am".
He paused.
I waited.
He continued,
"When you live in the past,
with its mistakes and regrets,
it is hard. I am not there.
My name is not I WAS.
When you live in the future,
with its problems and fears,
it is hard. I am not there.
My name is not I WILL BE.
When you live in this moment
it is not hard. I am here.
My name is I AM."

by Helen Mallicoat

Another "Wow" moment.

As the night went along, I asked him what he felt his purpose in life was.

He answered the question by saying every day his perspective changed. I pushed back, claiming that regardless what perspective you have, our EXISTENCE is based on give and take. We take food, water, information, money...etc. and give whatever we can give. So I asked again what he felt he gave back. He gave me some runaround answer which basically came down to "I help people solve problems they may have." But he still resisted calling this his PURPOSE. It was fascinating to me, because this man, who seemed to be much wiser than most people I have come across could not give me an answer to this simple question.

Now once upon a time, I would just accept his answer, thinking "Obviously, this guy has been on Earth far longer than me, I must just have much more to learn." But my name is not I WAS.

I thought about his words, and realized, this intelligent, thoughtful man has given up on seeking out his purpose. By that I mean, he knows in his heart what his purpose is, but he is not FULFILLING it to the greatest of his ability, and to ease the dischord this must cause in his soul, he denies its existence.

As I spent time philosophizing with him, I began to see him as an example of what my future could be. I sit around and think about shit all the time, but my spiritual growth DWARFS my growth in life. And I saw how he rationalized his position in life. He had worked numerous odd jobs and claimed that he had fun in each of them, and made decent money, which is fine. But I feel like he was far too satisfied with what life had presented him. Taking the closest, most convenient position is ok, making the best of it is great. But there's more. That can't be all there is. There has to be something to strive for, something to challenge us to grow beyond what we think we cannot do.

The way I see it, if you have something to give back to the world, to the universe, to your fellow human being, you should employ the tools at your disposal to reach as many people as possible. Every one of us has inside of us the ability to change the world. EVERY ONE OF US.

As our conversation concluded and we had another round of shots with everyone at the bar, Carson (you know, the guy who spent the entire night dropping knowledge and schooling me) leaned over to me and said "You taught me alot tonight."

"Wow" moment.

That's the give and take of life, brother.

Now I ask all of you this simple question:
What do you have to give?

Everyone comes into your life for a REASON, a SEASON, or a LIFETIME. Everyone teaches you something. Yes, even the assholes. Even the fuckers that do you dirty time and again. Appreciate everyone for that.

Peace and Love everyone,
I AM.